7/17/2020 @ 2pm

Mood: doing alright y’all

I’m doing alright. Almost been 5 weeks without a cigarette. I sure am putting on the pounds too. I feel better for the most part. Just a little irritable and depressed at times.

Work is going okay. I was super busy last week and I didn’t get much done. I couldn’t concentrate and I just was living in chaos.

I met a guy on a dating site and we talked all week via text. We were supposed to go on a date tonight but I canceled yesterday. I just don’t think I am mentally ready for anything like that. Rejection would break me. This whole week I have lived in chaos. All I’ve done is text this guy. I wasn’t doing my work at work, and I didn’t stick with my routine. I completely stopped doing what I normally do bc I was so wrapped up in a guy that I’ve never even met. I canceled last night and I haven’t heard from him since. I really think that I need to be in a better mental place before I start dating. I only wish I had someone to hang out with. I wish I had a single friend. My best friend is married now and her husband don’t ‘allow’ her to do just anything. ‘Allow’ …..lol…. yeah I’ll never get married if I have to ask for permission to do anything. That’s crazy!

My life is pretty boring. That’s all I got for now.

Published by lostinmyhead07

I'm an Engineer who has a severe case of bipolar 1. I'm just trying to stay in control and win this battle with bi polar.

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