Waiting for you to fall

Have you ever felt like so many people doubted you and were just waiting for you to fall?

I’ve had about 20 or more different jobs since I was 16. I always work a few months and then get mad and quit. When I was younger my grandmother would help pay my bills so there were times I was without a job for a long time. This isn’t something I am proud of but I’ve always had issues keeping a job longer than 8 months. Over the past 3 years I’ve had 6 different jobs. I always have another job before I quit but the viscous cycle continues. I finally found a good job and I can’t help but wonder if people are waiting for me to fail. I feel like so many people doubt my ability to hold down a job for an extended period of time. There are so many haters around me. What have I done to gain so much negative attention? I realize I’ve been an irresponsible adult and I am not proud of my past but I have finally grown up now. I can’t help my illness makes it hard for me to work with people sometimes. I’m thankful that the job I have now allows me to work independently. I love the people I work with. I did have issues with one person but that was all bc I came up with something in my head that wasn’t true. Luckily she is in her 50s and never held any cold feelings toward me. Although I have been reckless I am 100% confident that I will make this job last a long time. I actually like my job for once.

Published by lostinmyhead07

I'm an Engineer who has a severe case of bipolar 1. I'm just trying to stay in control and win this battle with bi polar.

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4 Comments

  1. Looking forward to reading your blog posts. I just read “lost in your head” in the emerging blogger series that Ashleyleia posted. Keep doing what you are doing.

    Liked by 1 person

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