8/6/2019 (5am)

For the past 2 nights I have slept maybe 4 hours. I am so manic right now. It really makes me reckless. This new medication has made my insomnia worse. I’ve been doing everything I am supposed to. Eating healthy, exercising, taking my medication correctly. Now I have to go to work and remember not to talk super fast, and not to say anything that is damaging to my chances of having my contract renewed in March. I can really tell a difference with my racing thoughts but I’ve still been having those racing thoughts. My future is on the line right now. This is my last chance to break into my field of study. I know life isn’t fair but it’s just not right to have to experience things like this when you do everything you are supposed to. My irritability is under control for the most part I think. I don’t feel so angry but I am thinking so fast, talking so much, dreaming the impossible…. Just very hyper. Life really is hard for me. It makes me want to cry sometimes. I’m so scared….

#mentalhealth

Published by lostinmyhead07

I'm an Engineer who has a severe case of bipolar 1. I'm just trying to stay in control and win this battle with bi polar.

Leave a comment

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: